On Sunday morning, I embarked on a day of feasting, sleeping and spending time with friends. No, I did not celebrate Christmas early, I had a hangover day. And it was brilliant.
When I am hungover, I tend to differ in my eating habits. I either eat nothing, or everything. This particular day, I ate everything. I shall list it now:
1. 1 slice of toast
2. A bacon sandwich
3. 2 sausages
4. 1 Christmas dinner
5. 1 mince pie
6. 1/3 tub of Haagan-Dazs
7. A few caramel buttons
8. Half a mini toblerone
9. A few scoops of walls soft scoop
10. 1 oreo
After this endeavor, I was unable to move.
Before eating this diet larger than Henry VIII’s, I had to buy the food. I walked to Tesco with some friends (who shall not be named for confidentiality purposes) and we picked our treats. One friend made me buy her ice cream also, as she recognized the Tesco till boy from a past drunken fling. There I was, two tubs of ice cream and toblerone in hand, and I approached the till. Before I was about to leave, he told me to ‘have a good night’… I can only interpret this as him believing I was either a) suicidal or b) a fat monstrous pig who enjoys these nights all the time. Either way, I felt quite insulted.
Is there a moral to this tale? Toblerone works very well as an ice cream spoon. And yes, I am still full.